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I used to cry after eating extra bread.
Not because it tasted bad. Because I thought I had ruined my entire diet.
One slice. One bloody extra slice. That’s all it took to make me spiral.
Calories. Metabolism. Energy balance.
We act like we understand them. But babe, we don’t.
And that confusion? That’s where 90% of our body-image drama lives.
📋 Table of Contents
The Key Takeaway.
You’re not gaining weight because you’re lazy or broken or destined to be “fat.” You’re just not being told the full story about calories, energy, and how your body actually works. And that silence is what is stealing your peace.
Calories.
You’ve heard it a million times: “Calories in vs. calories out.”
Yeah. But here’s what they don’t tell you:
- Calories are not the enemy.
- They’re literally just a unit of energy.
It’s like measuring fuel in your car. Nobody cries because their tank needs gas. But suddenly, when you need energy, it’s a moral crisis?
Make it make sense.
Understanding Calories, Metabolism & Energy Balance.
Let’s start where most of us start: Google.
You type “How many calories should I eat to lose weight?”
You get 7 different answers, 10 free apps, and one ridiculous TikTok telling you to eat 1,200 calories and call it a day.
Newsflash: 1,200 is what toddlers eat.
You are not a toddler. You’re a grown person with bills, stress, hormones, and a nervous system that’s hanging on by a thread.
Your body isn’t a calculator. It’s a living, breathing, adapting machine.
And that machine? It’s smart. So when you keep slashing your calories like a maniac, your body doesn’t clap for you. It panics. It slows your metabolism. It holds onto fat. It stops trusting you.
That’s why sometimes…
You eat less. You exercise more. And still? NOTHING.
Yeah. I’ve been there. Crying after 2 boiled eggs and 30 minutes of cardio. Because I thought I was doing everything right. But I just didn’t understand the real formula.
What Is Energy Balance?
Your body is like a phone.
Calories are the charger.
Metabolism is how fast or slow the phone uses power.
And energy balance is how much battery you’re gaining or losing.
- Eat more than you burn? Battery goes up. You gain weight.
- Eat less than you burn? Battery drops. You lose weight.
- Eat exactly what you burn? Battery stays steady. You maintain.
Simple, right? But the catch is that burning energy isn’t just gym time. It’s everything.
- Your brain thinking.
- Your organs functioning.
- Your body digesting food.
- Even blinking. Breathing. Feeling stressed. Having your period.
All of it uses energy. So if your fitness app only counts squats and steps? It’s giving DELUSIONAL.
What About Metabolism?
Metabolism is the girl everyone blames when things go south.
“Maybe my metabolism is just slow.”
No, maybe it’s not slow. Maybe it’s just tired.
From dieting, stress, inconsistency and from never being fed properly. Want to know what wrecks your metabolism faster than ice cream?
- Starving yourself for 5 days.
- Then binge-eating 2 days.
- Then crying about it for 3.
We’ve all done it. It feels like failure. But really, It’s survival. Your body’s trying to protect you. Even when you hate it.
How Do I Now Count Calories Properly?
You don’t need to count forever. But you do need to count correctly, at least for a while, to learn your body’s truth.
- Figure out your maintenance calories. Go online. Use a calorie calculator that factors in your age, weight, height, and activity. Don’t use one that assumes you’re a full-time athlete if you barely get out of bed.
- Eat slightly under that. Not 1,000 calories under. Just 200–500. Enough to lose fat, not your mind.
- Track your food but don’t become obsessed. Write it down or use an app like MyFitnessPal. But don’t cry if your jollof rice doesn’t have an exact match. Estimate. Learn. Adapt.
- Weigh your food for a week. Not forever. Just so your “tablespoon” doesn’t look like a shovel. Trust me, peanut butter lies to all of us.
- Focus on fiber, protein, and real food. You don’t have to live on salad. But protein keeps you full. Fiber keeps you sane. Junk makes you hungrier. Be smart.
- Sleep and stress matter more than you think. You could eat perfectly… but if you sleep 4 hours and hate your life?Your body’s like, “Yeah we’re keeping all this fat. Thanks.”
Warnings.
- You will feel impatient.
- You’ll want to throw your scale out the window.
- You’ll have weeks where you do everything right and nothing changes.
- And you’ll feel like giving up.
But please hear me: Your body is not your enemy.
It’s not sabotaging you. It’s adjusting. It is trying to trust you again.
And once it does? That weight comes off like magic.
This journey isn’t about numbers. It’s about trust. Respect. Peace. Food is not evil and calories are not curses.
